Saturday, February 2, 2008

I think I have "PTD"

POST TRIP DEPRESSION

I just have the BIG TIME BLUES -- I've never had them after leaving her before. I've always carried those "highs" with me for weeks following a trip. Not this time.

Maybe it's because of the wonderful connection we made with her. Maybe it's because she points at me when I ask "Where's Momma?" Maybe it's because she looks for Alan when I asked "Where's Dada?" Maybe it's because she WANTED ME a few minutes after our fostermom came for her. Maybe it's because of all the uncertainty with the new government and all the newly implemented plans for the future of adoptions. Maybe it's all the confusion following all these plans. Maybe it's just because I'm so tired of waiting and while the end is in sight, we are NOT guaranteed any time frame. I don't know what it is.......

What I do know is this - God has blessed me beyond what I deserve with my family! God gave Sydney to us and I will FIGHT till the end to bring her home. I will use the next few weeks to make sure her room is COMPLETELY ready for the Homecoming of the millenium!! It's time for my girl to come home and I truly believe, with all my heart, that the time is fast-approaching!!

3 comments:

Erek and Portia said...

I am aching for you! I can't imagine the anxiety you are feeling. I will continue to pray that Sydney comes home very soon.

Frances said...

Kristi,

It sounds like you had a wonderful trip and that ir brought you even closer to Sydney! I know it is hard...very hard. Hang in there...she will be home in your arms real soon.

Anonymous said...

Oh Kristi....my heart just goes out to you so much. I cannot immagine how much your heart is hurting right now. I wish I could just give you a big hug.

Continuing to pray...and holding you and your family close to my heart.